Finding my way

Do you ever question what you are doing with your life?
Do you sometimes feel as if something is missing but you don’t know what it is?
I still vividly remember the night where these two questions haunted me the whole night. A sleepless night where I continuously rolled throughout my bed, flitting thoughts inhibiting from laying my head to rest. I eventually came to realize that this unease would not settle until I addressed it.
It was surprisingly unusual because I had recently started listening to recordings of Tony Robins, ET, and many other motivational speakers. They were all addressing the issue of finding a purpose that manifests one’s destiny. It all started with just finding inspiration and energy to get me through the day-to-day activities. Little did I know that a time would come where I would be faced with the decision of whether or not to “go all the way in”.
What ensued in the following minutes, was one of the most enlightening reflections I have ever had in my short span of 25 years. I picked up my journal and started scribbling those thoughts and questions, unbothered by the fact that I had to be at my first clinical rotation in a year for my nursing program. Deep down, I just felt like I had to get it off my chest and I just kept writing and analyzing at my past.
It is those questions along with the teachings of Dr. Munroe, a world-renowned motivational speaker, that I would like to further dig in for your convenience. It is a story about how I found hope for dawn amidst a troubling night. These same introspective questions are what provided me some guidance through this quest for truth and self-discovery.

Who am i?
This is rather a terrifying question I must say, one that I am still attempting to answer. Nonetheless, I do believe that I have gained a fractional understanding of it. It is a question of identity. It is a matter that every human grapples with along his journey. I came to realize that I had to address this question to better gain an idea of how to find meaning in my life.
The Book of Life reminds us that “we are created in His image, His likeness”. I didn’t awaken to the embodiment of those words until I had put in countless hours of studying and meditating on the Word. Finding out that being created in his image implied that we also possess his character, presence, and faculties opened me up to the realm of endless possibilities.
So, I started to pick and pry at many books as I could addressing this concept to better gain an understanding of it. One truth that I learned is this: we are manifested into this physical realm for a purpose specifically designed for you and only you.
where am i from?
This was another challenging key to grasp concerning my introspective search for meaning. It was a question about heritage. What was my story? Who was my great-great-great-grandfather? Did my dad ever hear stories about him from his father? Where did my ancestors live? Did my ancestors hail from Rwanda as well or another domain?
As a black man, it is a question that I believe we are frightened by because of the Middle Passage era that has stained most of our rich heritage. You see, Africans along with all other diaspora communities scattered around the globe do struggle with this fundamental question. It is not specifically reserved to mostly descendants of slaves, though what they have endured no man should ever have to live through those predicaments.
I struggled with this question because I believe that if you know where you come from, you are essentially aware of your identity and will henceforth where you are headed. Heritage plays a key role in the establishment of a positive self-image because how are you ever going to get far in life if you don’t believe in yourself.
“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.” (Jeremiah 1:5)
“For I know the plans I have for you” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future”. (Jeremiah 29:11)
“Our ancestors sinned and are no more, and we bear their punishment. Slaves rule over us, and there is no one to free us from their hands. We get our bread at the risk of lives because of the sword in the desert”. (Lamentations 5:7-9)
Before I address these verses, I want to clarify that I don’t identify myself as a prophet or an individual who should be held to the highest regard. I am a simple man just like you, sharing a story of what I found along in search of the truth.
These verses helped me realize that my story was established and written by a higher conscious power (The Most High Elohim) to fulfill His purpose. More importantly, I came to realize that no matter how hard it tried to fight it or ignore it, life became more unbearable. My creator knew me before I even came to know and love myself.
It was at that moment that I understood that a person’s existence is a testament to winning the race already by navigating through the fallopian tubes to make into this world. Consequently, we come into this world to survive and experience a series of changes and crises designed to help us discover our truest self. If this is something you can relate to and are yourself struggling with, I want you to know that it is perfectly fine, we are all trying to figure it out.
why am i here?
This question of purpose is definitely what inspired me to go all-in because I finally understood that my existence was not coincidental because many fetuses do not get the opportunity to live their truth. Awakening to this harsh truth made me value this gift of life.
I had to make every effort to live a life that I would not be ashamed of remembering. Make no mistake I, too, am far from perfect but I am trusting in the process to get better each day. Learning from my mistakes, embracing my blessings, my fears, my supporters, and my naysayers because they all play a vital role in the makeup of my character.
Understanding that not every adversity or crisis that comes my way is meant to break me, but rather awaken the dormant potential in me was unquestionably what I needed during this journey, especially with our current state of affairs.
what can i do?
“There is a time for everything and a season for every activity under the heavens”. (Ecclesiastes 3:1)
“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose”. (Romans 8:28)
Studying the concept of potential has been the most gratifying. I picked up any self-help books I could get my hands on, whether it was about faith, purpose, or finding meaning you name it. To this day, it is still something that I am still passionate about because it reignited a passion for me.
Acquiring that vital information afforded me the comfort to know that it’s alright to want success and meaning in my life. In the same way, Dr. Munroe would affirm, “no one knows a product better than its manufacturer”. It was around this time that I started studying and meditating on the Word.
I finally understood that when you align your plans with the inner purpose of your creator, you will gain a sense of clarity on how to go about it. Life does truly become more entertaining. I unconsciously started appreciating the simple things at a deeper level.
Class is never out of session when it comes to life lessons.
There’s always room for growth and always expect change. After all, it’s inevitable like the wise Heraclitus once claimed, “No man ever steps in the same river twice”.
where am i going?
This is a question of vision.
How do you see yourself 5 years from now? 10 years from now?
Do you envision yourself living the life that you want?
Well, the good news is that it is never too late to manifest your destiny. As long as you are living, that opportunity is still at hand, eagerly waiting for you to get on board.
What you strongly resonate with, eventually manifests in your perceptional reality.
Setting a vision for myself provided me a target to visualize on, something that I truly aspired for. Having a vision is a good thing, especially when it is a genuine one. You start connecting with all sorts of caring people who share a similar attitude, you start learning from their experiences, even become inspired.
I highly recommend checking out the story of Bill. – Unshakable Hope –
The Book of Proverbs reminds us that “Where there is no vision, the people perish”. (Proverbs 29:18)
Having a vision reminds you that what you are currently going through is only a season, intended to get you to your promised land.
remain steadfast
Whatever you may be going through, always keep a positive attitude and hang on to hope. You could be doing well, struggling to find your zone, or even needing a sign of hope, let this story be an invitation to keep on striving one day at a time because it will get better.
Man ultimately wants to indent a mark in this world, whether he is aware of it or not, otherwise he would not be tormented by regrets when that appointed time lurks around
You ain’t never alone…